We’re painting our nails, while the boys hover around the laptop looking at funny videos from The Adventurer’s latest dance beneath a Hawaiian Sun. The Tallest one with ever sun kissed skin and a curly top knot falling forward as he balances himself on the kitchen counter, legs steadily reaching for the roof, and we’re all laughing.

We’re all laughing and I check my Instagram, cause that’s what one does when they’re slightly addicted to photos and friendship.

There they are kneeling in a row, beautiful with heads hanging along a beach wearing bright orange jumpers as though the scene itself needed some kind of sun to shine. Or maybe they didn’t realize the attention they’d drawn without including such brightly colored gear. Either way its all too much.

I close my phone immediately. I don’t know how, but I’m deeply effected.

How is all this happening? I’ve been so caught up in living this better story for God turned a schedule just stupid busy, and it doesn’t even seem to matter while men in bright jumpsuits kneel before captors ready to take their life because of their belief.

What is happening? How is all this happening?

We continue with our conversation and talk for hours about how life is about to change dramatically for me, though I don’t even know what that really means. We talk about boys and work and the power of prayer, but the back of my eyes seem burned with an image of bowed heads and humbled hearts as though something out there is greater than everything I’m ever a part of. What is happening?!

I get in my car and try not to cry too hard, though I hear those who sow in tears will reap with shouts of joy. I don’t even know these men who just gave their life for the sake of the Cross but what kind of life are we living? Where did I begin wasting my time as though being busy with the second bests mattered more than being available to love fully? These men in jumpsuits aren’t even the start of it. Every day men, women, babies are giving up their life for the sake of Christ and I’m over here caught up in a daily planner.

I’ve never wanted to scream to the whole world nearly as much as I did last night on those back roads littered with short golden wheat holding strong amidst melting drifts of snow.

This, right here. This, right now. This, today, in this very moment. This is our time, is it not?

Isn’t it?

I’d like to honor God with my life. I think you’d like to as well. I’m certain we’re all doing well, but today I’m just wondering if my time is well spent? I’m not saying we need to be crazy and wild like the wind or waves. No, no. We need to be solid like the Cornerstone, steady, calculated and certain in all that we do. Yes even in the Instagramming, the Facebook perusing, the grocery shopping, the staying home and learning more about Christ than the Kardashians, the bravery in adventure, the hoping, the traffic, the workplace, the home.

Because I’d just like to honor God with my life. Quite clearly He laid it out; they’re guna hate you, but only because they hated me first, he says. And yet more importantly His command is nothing to do with hate, but love. Get out there, love people, he says. And this right here, this right now, this time that we have today… this is our time…

… Isn’t it? All I can see is men, the ocean, and bright orange like honor itself dripping all around them.

This is my command: Love each other. John 15.17