I have this idea in my mind that a blessing looks like golden opportunity in a seemingly black hole, like a musical with Sister Maria from Sound of Music, or like money falling out of a lack-luster sky. I’m honestly not sure how to respond when a blessing from God looks more like hand-me-downs and cans of evaporated milk on an otherwise emptied table. Blessings? Really?

And that’s the thing. I have this idea of what blessings from above are supposed to look like. They’re supposed to look glamorous, not good, right?! Wrong. So wrong. What we’ve been promised is that all good things come from our good father in heaven above. He is rarely if ever concerned about this whole glamour idea.

I’ve never really had a ‘home’ but in the passed three years, more  than ever before it, this fact has haunted me. I reminded Jesus I didn’t care for a mansion. I let Him know I didn’t need brand new, and I really wasn’t that picky. As long as my roommate wasn’t a secret stalker slash murderer or that they didn’t complain about everything through passive aggressive dishwashing (yes, the two are comparable), I’d do my best and live in gratitude.

Jesus reminded me of his time on earth. He reminded me there was burrows for foxes and nests for birds, but not even a place for the Son of God to rest his head. He knew what my heart was going through. Being thirty and homeless was probably not His favorite some days either. He reminded me He gets me because He’s been here too. He led me quick and quietly through the homes of literally everywhere I have slept and reminded me I have always been blessed. Like a movie playing I watched my family and friends blessing me for a week or for years with futons, bunk beds, and basements to lay my sleepy head.

Sure it might not look like my own hostable home, a home in which I think I’ll always dream about with Jesus. But these blessings of home along the way is where I lay safe and sound on my bed.

Sometimes there seems to be a contradiction in the blessings we receive. Really God, is this really it? We ask about finances, homes, family, friendships, relationships, and careers; this is your provision for me? Yes, perhaps hand me downs and evaporated milk really are it in this season… and perhaps it’s more incredible than we allow ourselves to really see. And while totally okay to ask, I’d urge you to simply get ready for Him to speak clearly into all that you have already been given. Once He’s through you might sit back similarly as I am now in awe safe and sound, and incredibly blessed.