Here’s the thing. I was rushing (oh wait, sitting) through traffic and trying not to be a beast as early (or late) as 7am. Typically I breeze through those city streets because I choose to be up by 5.30am so I can get perspective on the purpose of my day… today though, I’m out the door nowhere near prepped with the best sort of love clothed over my heart. Nope, not today. I just left the house and turn back around because somehow I’d forgotten to brush my teeth. Not okay.

Of course I end up in traffic; the worst place a chick can find herself on a Tuesday morning. But as I was sitting in traffic this guy on the radio starts talking about girls and how much we take selfies, and just how cautious we need to be with selfies because of what they can destroy. I agree. We need to be careful. Notice I didn’t say we have to stop- we have to be careful. And I wouldn’t limit it to ladies, I would say there needs to be caution all the same for men.

It got me thinking though, mostly because that’s something I cannot stop myself from doing, but also because I had the time. And I was stuck there thinking about all these silly things we do like take seventy-three selfies and choose the original picture anyhow, and then sit there staring at the screen in wonder how many people will like them on Instagram. I wondered about just how much we look at ourselves and consider about our likability and how much we suck at life or how much we need to change. It’s been a thought roaming around in my mind for some time because people keep saying ridiculous things like I need to forgive myself or I need to take a look at myself. The problem isn’t looking at our character or figuring out where we’re at. The problem is looking at yourself a thousand ways and never landing the plane on real growth, or identifying who you were intended to be. Instead, we mostly look at ourselves, see a flaw, look in a slightly different way, and see yet another flaw.

First, where in scripture does it say we need to forgive ourselves? We are not higher than the mercy, goodness or grace of Christ; let’s simply accept His forgiveness over our lives and legit kick the enemy out when he makes us think we need to work more for something we are not good enough to redeem ourselves with. Ever. Besides, perfection isn’t attainable when we’re human, only excellence is acheivable through looking at the redemption of your life in Christ. Secondly, I’ve got to stop looking within unless I clearly define that looking within is looking directly at Christ in my heart and nowhere near myself aside. Otherwise, I’ve got to look directly at His word and know it deep down in my soul to truly know who I am and how I look.

The light turns red and I haven’t even taken my foot off the brake. “You’re looking a little on the selfie side Dee,” I say out loud to myself with muttered breath. And while I know it takes time, I don’t want to keep looking at myself and stopping there. I only see scratches, bruises and dirt. Nothing adds up and I’d like to look from different angles at the same heart but somehow see things differently. I see everything I believe isn’t good enough. But when I look at Christs’ version, I see me for who I was truly intended to be. No more measuring up. No more seventy-three selfies. Besides, by the time you get to selfie number seventy-three, we all know you’ll want to chose the original it looked so good to begin with.